The Case for Falling in Love: Why We Can't Master the Madness of Love - and Why That's the Best Part by Mari Ruti, PhD
Publication Date: February 2011
(Received for review from Sourcebooks)
Purchase: Barnes & Noble, Book Depository, Books-A-Million, IndieBound
If you live in Morehead, KY or the surrounding area:
Purchase from our local independent bookseller: CoffeeTree Books
Borrow from our local library: The Rowan County Public Library
Mari Ruti on the Web: Website, Facebook, Twitter
Excerpt from The Case for Falling in Love
Synopsis (Book Blurb):
ARE YOU TIRED OF HEARING THAT MEN AND WOMEN COME FROM DIFFERENT PLANTS?
Are you sick of the idea that men and women live in separate emotional universes?
ARE YOU FED UP WITH TRYING TO SOMEHOW OVERCOME THIS AND FIND LOVE?
You're not the only one.
But maybe we're thinking about it all wrong. Mari Ruti argues that our culture's insistence that women need to learn how to catch and keep a man is actually doing much more harm than good. The more we try to manipulate our relationships, she says, the less we are truly able to experience love's benefits and wonders. Love is a slippery, unruly thing, and trying to control and manage it robs us of it's delicious unpredictability.
Sure, letting go of the reins a bit might mean a broken heart, but Ruti says that heartbreak, in fact, offers a wealth of possibilities - creativity, wisdom, and growth - that we need in order to make the most of our lives.
Liberating for women who are frustrated by the idea that they just need to learn the right "formula," The Case for Falling in Love shows that there isn't a method to mastering the madness of love. But that might be exactly what's so wonderful about it.
It you are anything like me, you are tired of hearing about how different men and women are. Mari Ruti, PhD's new book, The Case for Falling in Love doesn't give readers a patented formula to follow that will magically lead them to true love. It throws all the messages that society gives off today that say men must "tricked" into falling in love because they are "wired" differently from women, out the window.
The author offers readers a practical guide to changing how they think about male and female roles in a relationship, and what love and romance is all about. Love is very complex emotion, which isn't figured out very easily. Finding love is something that most people have in common. It's something that is everyone wants deep inside themselves. Many researchers try to come up with the perfect way to find the man or woman of your dreams, but it just isn't something that works that way. The author shows the reader that the "madness" of love, very well may be the best part. The unpredictability and uncertainty make the feelings stronger and deeper.
Mari Ruti is a very well educated author who is qualified to write this type of book. Her experiences as the assistant director of Harvard's study of women, gender and sexuality, helped her to write a book that is sound on research while also being an entertaining read. I expected it to read more like a work of study than a good book, but I was definitely surprised at how the author was able to make the information very assessable and something that I really found interesting and fun to read. It is quick witted and very passionate. It's easy to tell that the author really believes what she's writing about.
This is a book that will appeal to women who are tired of the tried and true methods that others have offered for falling in love. Are men and women really so different? After reading this book... I'm not so sure. The author makes a compelling case for just letting go and letting love take care of itself. You may suffer a broken heart in some cases but the love you find will be more real and lasting than if you are constantly worrying about what you should do next to find your Mr. Right.
I enjoyed this one much more than I thought I would and I found the author's information engaging and interesting. I was impressed with the author's education and felt her passion for her subject matter. I think this is a book that will make a lot of sense to women and will help them relax and enjoy love without being so caught up in the machinations of it.
The Case for Falling in Love is available NOW from your favorite bookseller.
I'm giving this one 4 out of 5 apples from my book bag! I liked it a lot.
Mari Ruti, Ph.D, was educated at Brown, Harvard, and the University of Paris. After finishing her Harvard doctorate in 2000, she spent four years as assistant director of the university's program for the study of women, gender, and sexuality. She is currently associate professor of critical theory in the University of Toronto's English Department. She splits her time between Toronto, the East Coast, and Maui.